Hope Wellness Institute
9801 Fair Oaks Blvd. Suite 200
Fair Oaks, CA 95628
Trauma
Trauma's are a little like sand traps on the golf course. In golf they seem to be placed right where I hit the ball and when it gets close they seem to reach out and grab it.
Some are relatively shallow and easy to navigate.
The reported time for each cycle revolves around 21 days. I find my cycles take longer when:
- The pattern I want to replace has been "set" stronger over a longer time or with lots of repetitions.
- I become inconsistent with my morning prep or daily practice.
- I use the pattern I want to replace even accidently or for good reason in another context.
- This one isn't as important to me = I'm less motivated and committed.
Desire
I start with patterns where I really want to experience the new thought or behavior.
"Have to changes" are more difficult and I find often slower I started with patterns that were important to me.
I was also smart enough (probably lucky) to start with ones I could easily do reputedly during the day. I saw success more often which was good for my attitude and the repetitions were important for driving those successes.
Small bites
This is an active participation "sport."
Start with one pattern. Explore what it really takes to implement it fully and how success feels as you go through the process.
I find trying to monitor and manage several changes at once to be more work and less fun. I am more successful when I keep it fun = always working on 1 and not working on more than 2 for me.
I run though the 5 step process each morning on each pattern to get it into my thinking.
Then I "practice" it several times during the day through three 21 day cycles
Protein (amino acids) 8 %
I choose thought and behavior patterns I want to experience. Now it's time to integrate them into my day so I do experience them and experience them multiple times and regularly. This varies by the thought and behavior but Can I schedule to do this once an hour? How do I make this easy/ automatic rather than having to think about it each time?
I chose to start with patterns that were repeatable during my day so it was easy to multiple repititions in each day. Then I found later i was better prepared to take on something like racing thoughts at bed time where getting in the repititions was more difficult.
Steps
Step 1
Explore Curiously
Step 1. Curiously Explore
- What I am doing now?
- How do I experience this thought / behavior?
- Why did I start it?
- Was there a benefit? Is there still?
- What do I like about it?
- What would I loose by stopping or changing it?
- What about it is a problem?
- What would I gain by changing?
- What would I do instead?
Step 2
Dive Deep
Step 2. Dive Deep
- What is the sequence that leads me to my current pattern?
- How is this related to patterns I developed earlier in life?
- Where do I want to put a detour that avoids the current pattern and leads to the new one?
- If this is a new pattern I want to add - what triggers do I want to put in place to guide me to this pattern?
Step 3
Gather
Step 3. Collect
- How do I say this in my words?
- What words motivate me to do this?
- What pictures? What songs? . . .
- How do I incorporate these so they support making them mine?
- Hand writing is better than typing.
- Maybe drawing a picture or collage.
- Maybe a poem.
- An especially meaningful line from a book or scripture.
- Make them mine! Own them!
Step 4
Integration
Step 4. Incorporate
How do I "forward think" these into my day?
They support/ are the experience I want to have. How do I make them a repeated part of my day?
When will I use them?
What will remind (trigger) me to do them?
Step 5
Repetition
Step 5. Repeat
Program this into my life each day.
This is a though/ experience I want. How many times can I make it happen in my day?
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Step 3. Gather
How do you say this in your words?
What words motivate you to do this?
What pictures? What songs? . . .
How do I incorporate these so they support making them mine?
Hand writing is more effective than typing.
Maybe drawing a picture or collage.
Maybe a poem.
An especially meaningful line from a book or scripture.
Make them mine! Own them!
This is drawn from the research papers, books, interviews and podcasts of
Dr. Jud Bower - youtube channel
Dr. Caroline Leaf - website